What a difference 3 years make......

I meant to post this last week as my anniversary was here and has now passed, but still very significant for me. I needed to write my feelings of where i was at now 3 years ago. I don't remember the date specifically, but remember it being a Friday and the Blue Angels were in town for the weekend's Fleet Week festivities in San Francisco. It was a Friday afternoon that I and my loving hubby caught a BART train to San Francisco. I had an appointment with an OB/GYN at UCSF Medical Center. I'm not quite sure why i had made the appointment, but I think it was that i wanted another OB/GYN's opinion on the results from the D & C my OB/GYN had performed a month earlier.  A few weeks earlier my OB/GYN (DR. B) had told me that I had endometrial cancer, also known as Uterine Cancer, and her recommendation for treatment was to get a hysterectomy. OF course she referred me to an Oncologist, but i guess i wanted to get another OB/GYN's opinion. I will remember that Friday afternoon clearly. It was a beautiful sunny day in the City, and the Blue Angels were practicing over the city's skyscrapers and I can remember being in awe of the jets flying overhead as my hubby and I waited for the Muni Bus to take us to our final destination.

It was fairly quick appointment. The OB/GYN as UCSF Medical (Dr. X) reviewed the pathology report copy that had been faxed to him by Dr. B's office. He simply said that I indeed had cancer. He then went on to give me his recommendation for treatment. He was a nice older man, probably late 50s early 60s, and told me what he would recommend if it were his daughter. He agreed with Dr. B, and even told me some Dr.s out there would recommend treatment that is outside the box and would prescribe a hormone treatment. But there weren't enough studies to show that it was more effective than immediate surgery to remove the uterus.  So now i had been told by 2 OB/GYNs that I would need a hysterectomy.  I recall the ride back into downtown San Francisco on the bus be a gloomy one. My hubby and didn't speak too much.  I had done research and knew that usual course of treatment was a hysterectomy, but there was a little proof that hormone therapy with progesterone also helped women of reproductive age maintain their uterus, get rid of cancer and go on to form families of their own.  

I was certainly confused and unsure what my future would have held for me and my husband. We so badly wanted to have children and we were faced with possibility that we would not have that option.  Since i have the world's greatest husband, he took me to a place that he was sure was going to bring a smile to my face and we can forget reality for a little while. He took me to the Disney Store at Union Square.  Now my husband, before now, did not like to step foot inside the Disney Store.... I think i irritated him with my oooohs and awes every time i dragged him into a store. He fed the inner child in me and walked with me through out the store and even pointed to things he thought i would oooh and awe too. He also bought me the most beautiful Little Mermaid snow globe. I LOVE the Little Mermaid. This would be the 2nd to my now nice collection of Little Mermaid snow globes.  He knew what would bring back some joy and happiness to me, and he did it all on his own. We walked out of the store with our new purchase and had a quick dinner and headed home. 

My husband was always optimistic, even when I didn't want him to be so. As we all know, misery sometimes likes a little company.  For a few brief moments, life seem to pull the rug from under me, and thought for sure that I would not know what it would be like to feel my baby move and grow with in, but 3 years later here I am.  While it is hard for me not to worry all the time, i do manage not to worry about my little baby all the time, and I enjoy the pregnancy along with my husband. My husband is happy as can be, and is so loving and so helpful.  I fall in love with my husband all over again all the time. I am so thankful to God and to everyone who prayed for me and was by my side for the short/longest 6 months while I was in treatment for cancer. I was fortunate enough to catch the cancer early and after consulting 2 separate oncologist, and both agreeing that hormone therapy would help me.  I'm forever grateful to God that I responded to the progesterone treatment and was cancer free 4 months after beginning treatment with progesterone.  

It did take us 3 years after originally being diagnosed to conceive our first child, and although it was a bumpy road, we are here and expecting our first child.  I feel very blessed, and always felt blessed because after a gloomy moment in the fall of 2005, God took care of me and I can say now that I am pregnant. Which so far all is going great following my bleeding episode.  I had a sonogram last Monday where my hubby and I saw our baby flipping around and moving all around. It was amazing. We both laughed and I cried, and just felt so blessed. Many more blessings to come I'm sure!