And Baby makes 3...

Yup, we will be a family of 3 come May 2009!! We transfered two perfect embryos and one decided to stick around and get comfortable!! I am still in bit of shock that it will actually happen. AFter all years of ups and downs, after the river of tears I have cried, and all the frustration, I will be a mom! I think it will still feel a bit surreal until I start to show and I get to feel the flutters of my baby's movement within me.  My hubby I think is still in shock too.  We started to talk about what we think what gender the baby will be. I say girl, he says boy. Apparently his mom says it will be a boy... she has a feeling!! LOL I would really love to have a girl, but I am just praying for a healthy baby, a smooth pregnancy, and a joyful birth in May of 2009.

Honestly, I still feel nervous and i can't wait to really fully let that go and just relax and enjoy.  I really do hate that because of our long fertility journey I know just too much information. I just know of all the things that could go wrong.  There are so many things that can go wrong that the 'normal' pregnant woman would not even know. I really wish i was ignorant for it is blissful! But I am getting better on not dwelling on the negative...

 I really am trying very hard to just focus on the positive, like hearing the beating heart of my baby! It was such a wonderful sound and I was in complete awe. It was magical! I know that moms-to-be for years have been able to hear their baby's heart beat, but I just was caught up in the fascination of being able to hear the beating heart of my baby, who looked like a little lima bean, being so tiny! I couldn't help but to cry.  Hubby couldn't stop smiling!!! We are feeling very lucky and blessed to have come this far and we are so much more appreciative.  We will really cherish every single step of this pregnancy together. And my hubby is sure stepping up too. He has done the dishes, he helps with dinner (especially when I'm feeling to nauseated to touch raw foods), and always makes sure to ask how i'm feeling.  He still can't believe how often i have to take a trip to the bathroom... that part i can really do with out though! LOL

While I think that I will always worry a little bit, with time I will focus on all positives.  Every day, despite my fears and nerves, I pray to God to let God know that no matter what fears i may display, I really really do believe! I believe that God hasn't led me this far only to pull the rug from under us. I really do believe that come Mother's day 2009, I will be a mother! 

To my Sister's still struggling with infertility, don't loose hope, even when it really seems hopeless.  It is difficult to remain hopeful and to maintain the faith, but it will happen. It really does happen in God's time.  God is great and hasn't forgotten, it just isn't the time yet.  After 5 long years of ups & downs and through my journey with fighting Cancer, here I am 7 weeks pregnant! All my Fertility challenged sisters, I continue to maintain you all in my prayers, and know that your time will get here!